Humans ignore the evidence of their own eyes to create a fictional stable world
aka
In certain circumstances people do not even notice if a room grows to four times its size via Pasta&Vinegar

"The Virtual Reality Research Group in Oxford used the latest in virtual reality technology to create a room where they could manipulate size and distance freely. They made the room grow in size as people walked through it, but subjects failed to notice when the scene around them quadrupled in size. As a consequence, they made gross errors when asked to estimate the size of objects in that room.
(…)
These results imply that observers are more willing to adjust their estimate of the separation between the eyes or the distance walked than to accept that the scene around them has changed in size,’ says Dr Glennerster. ‘More broadly, these findings mark a significant shift in the debate about the way in which the brain forms a stable representation of the world. They form part of a bigger question troubling neuroscience – how is information from different times and places linked together in the brain in a coherent way?’"

Why the heck am I posting this?
Well, I automatically started pondering about the implications of this finding... what might this mean with regards to any experiences in a virtual world? How many of our perceptions and deductions made in virtual space are "adjusted" by ourselves without our own awareness?

"I play World of Warcraft. Yes, I am the enemy. I play the game and I enjoy it. before I played WoW, I played Everquest and before that, Ultima Online and a multitude of other games you probably all hate on down to character based MUDs back in the late eighties and early nineties. I like computer games.

That said, I recognize I spend far too much time playing these games. I'm single, 36, never married. I'm very overweight. I work as a computer programmer and I generally excel at my job. I started to think I was playing too much and started looking around for support and found this group.

Part of what you maybe don't realize about why there is such a draw to these games for your significant other is because the game is full of people like them. People that play all the time. People that realize they are playing all the time. We joke about it. People that sleep at night are slackers. As much as Everquest Widows is a support group for you, the game is a support group for us. When one of you complains to your significant other that he/she is not spending time with you, we joke that he/she has wife or girlfriend aggro (aggro being an in game term that means a monster is attacking you) and that he/she needs to work on wife or girlfriend faction (a tedious in game task involving repeatedly killing the same monsters over and over to gain favor with other in game personalities).

The posts that strike me the most ... are the ones that talk about suing Sony or spying on your significant others. Suing Sony because your significant other plays too much Everquest is like blaming McDonald's for fat people or blaming gun manufacturers for robberies. Sony and Blizzard and all the other MMO game makers are not the cause of your problems. My advice for those of you wanting to spy on your significant others, who want to know what they are saying in game, who want to be able to change their passwords and delete their characters is pack your bags and leave now. A relationship is nothing without trust.

You want your significant others back? Find out what is driving them to stay in the game because its not the game itself. Their are plenty of people that play the game and have healthy relationships, not that I'm one of them. For me, it's pretty easy, I don't have a SO and losing weight is really freaking hard (at least for me it is). Talk to your SO about the game or, god forbid, play it with them. I can tell you one of the things we gamers all drool over is the ever elusive gamer chick. Learn the game! If I saw someone trying to meet me halfway about something I really enjoy it would give me alot of incentive to meet that person halfway with their interests and needs. I think if someone we're just giving me a hard time about the game the stubborn streak in me would just make me want to play it more. We really like to talk about the game. Aside from all the time we spend in game playing it, most of us spend as much time reading and talking about it outside the game. Be the person we talk to about it. As time goes on maybe he or she will realize that the satisfaction derived is not coming from the game at all but from the interaction with you.

My post is not meant to be offensive to anyone. I realize many of you are in very different situations than I am as married people often with children. I'm struggling with the time I put into the game, but I do enjoy it."

Every now and then someone comes along with a story, goes away and returns with a life update that has become one of contentment and happiness. In this case, thanks to going through the struggles and re-evaluating his life, he's still pursuing a medical career, working full-time and feeling like he's a good role model to his kids. Updates like these provide a little spark of happiness and hope to you, too, I hope.

Have a look at this article from Terra Nova: World of Warcraft is the New Golf. and the associated "Power lunching with wizards and warriors".

Do I think that happens? Sure. Do I agree with it? Well, that answer coincides with my answer to the question "Do I like the fact that business deals are made on the golf course and in bars?"...

Thank you.

"Ok, I am a former EQ & EQ2 addict. I played EQ1 for over a year(this was way before I met my husband), I was even in the beta. 4 years after I quit I played EQ2 for about a year. If my husband tried to take me away on a romantic getaway while I was mired in my addiction I probably would have gone along but the ENTIRE time I would have been thinking about playing the game. Spend your money more wisely and get yourselves to marriage counseling. In my case, I played EQ1 because I was in a very controlling relationship with a man who would not let me leave the house alone among other things. When I finally escaped that relationship I quit EQ1. I went back to my addiction because I was missing something in my marriage that I thought I could find in fantasy land. I was lonely, had low self-esteem and was using the game as an escape from my husbands short temper. I finally left him while he was at work. I packed all my stuff in a U-Haul and headed across the country. He caught up to me halfway across the next state and begged me to come home. I logged on to EQ once after we got back to give away all of my items and say goodbye then I deleted the game from my system. We are BOTH working on our marriage now. I can bet you that if your partner is addicted to EQ it is because there are other issues that need to be addressed. And I'm not saying its the wids fault either. Just look deeper than the addiction if you want to try and solve the problem.

Also, you may want to try to replace EQ with an equally entertaining but FAR less addictive game like Morrowind. When I get the itch to play EQ (which is probably twice a month) I load my last save game of Morrowind and the game world is exactly as I left it. I don't have to obsess over it because when I'm not there, the world stops. One of the biggest problems with EQ is that it keeps going after you log off and you don't know what you might be missing out on. With an offline game you don't miss anything and if you die or screw up you can just load your last saved game and everything is fixed. There is also less pressure to keep leveling up so that you can continue to play with your guildmates because you are the only one there. And... brace yourself now... you can -pause- the game. I get all the saticfaction of hacking a monster to bits without all of the unnecessary stress."

If you know someone who plays online games but feel you don't know / understand enough, here is an online magazine that may help: The Escapist. A interesting recent issue is #27, published on January 10th, 2006 titled "I Can Stop Playing Whenever I Want".

"I used to be way addicted to Everquest. I was probably hooked on the game for over 2+ years playing around 6+ hours a day.

It was the cause for a massive amount of weight gain and also withdrawal from society as a whole.

I am everquest free for over a year now and I have lost over 130lb in one year and am in the best shape of my life. The folks that are hooked on everquest in my opinion are highly motivated and focused people. They just have to get their focus away from the game and on LIFE and living. It is a convenient escape and now I see it as a bunch of time that I wasted with zero return.

I look up and I am 27 years old and single. I could have met someone great by now and I lost a lot of time that I am paying for now to get back.

Hope someone finds this as an inspiration, because I know that if you have a loved one hooked on the game, please show them how if they focus their attention somewhere else that they can accomplish great things like I have.

I have never felt better, moved into a new house, and dating and having a blast in real life.

I still play video games, but its on MY schedule and usually only for about 30 minutes at a time and I can always put it down. My loved ones are always first."

"I just wanted to say thanks for the blog. It helps put my problem in perspective, just seeing the stories is helpful to show that this is real. It's easy to say 'this is something I really like to do', instead of 'this is something I am obsessive about'. My story isn't as severe as the ones on your site, but I know I play way too much (3-4 hours+ /day)."

"I am truly horrified and ashamed for the misery I must have put my life and kids through. I have been reading your posts for a while now and have cut down my game time to maybe 2 or 3 hours between my 2 days off but I must admit it is VERY difficult. I think I have neglected my kids and my wife and now realize that this has got to stop. I love my kids more than life itself and know now what I have to do. Before we married, my wife and I played a lot and even after my first daughter was born, she and I would still play for 8 to 10 hours strait with ... in my wifes lap, breastfeeding. As ... got older, my wife with all her mothering sense just stoped playing and soon it was only me. It is true, even after my second daughter, I have sat there playing while my wife was struggling with the kids and cooking and cleaning. Its a wonder I still have them around. Now, I make sure I love on both kids at least an hour or two a day after work and only play on my days off while the baby ... sleeps. I can only say now that I owe my wife more than just an apology. This valentines day will be the best, well second best (second daughters conception on valentines day 2 years ago ... was the best). I am going to announce that my EQ accounts are not going to be renewed (along with flowers, chocolates and love notes becuase I never forgot). Hard to forget a 2 year courtship ending one very memorable valentines day followed by a marriage in Las Vegas 2 weeks later. We eloped and I am planning to steal her away again, I hope. If I am not too late.... I am very foolish and only hope that I can be forgiven for my failings. I have an addictive personality and had to give up drugs for my wife and although at times crave them as I know I will the game, I can never go back. I feel like I have sworn off a whole set of friends who meant no harm but only got me in trouble. I am not sad though, I have my daughters and my wife ... who I know will fill my life with what I was always lacking. Reality."

"It is strange isn't it-how we put up with this kind of stuff in the name of love. I am a true co-dependent. I came from an alcoholic family. I am so much against alcohol. When I found a man that didn't drink at all I thought I had the grand prize. He is a good man- his only fault is that dumb game that he plays to excess- It is funny but my shrink pointed out to me that I was with an addict- I did not see it as that- But it is the same. I don't think he can quit and the best thing for me to do is get out and move on. I have a good job-lots of friends, I am a very social person. I love people and I love life. He only wants to stay on that dumb game. He prefers cartoon characters to me and the kids. Since I blew my stack he has started getting off to eat with us when the kids are around but if they aren't home he eats at the computer-He does not even go to the bathroom. Anyway I am rambling but this is probably the saddest thing I have been through. To have to sit back and see a man waste his entire life away playing a game that will only cost him the family he says he loves. I do believe he loves us- I know he loves me but he lovesEverquest so much more. So what do I do? Right now I have given this to my higher power- I am living my own life the best way I can- he will not ruin me- Hopefully he will change but I don't see that happening.

...

I did leave for three weeks- He cried like a baby- I have my own home and for soem reason I have never sold it. So I came home went to work and stayed busy with my job, kids, friends etc. I was happy- I really was but there is this co-dependent in me. When someone needs me I go to go take care of them. It was Christmas time, family was coming so it was only supposed to be to put up a front for them. He was a good boy- we had a wonderful holiday, he did not play everquest- We had good quality family time and time with each other.So I went back and the New Years weekend on New Years eve he left me sitting while he played that game for over 12 hours. The next day I packed up and came home. He starts telling me how he will die without me. So I decided to only go see him on weekends ( which is when he really plays EQ) We made a compromise- see he says I am being unreasonable by complaining- he lets me do my thing- live my life. My life is normal- I work a full time job, go to aerobics three nights a week take care of a ... daughter, run three miles twice a week, and I go to Church. I visit friends and I have fun that I consider to be normal. I take care of him cleanhouse cook--- I do not play a game or do anything 12 hours a day and neglect him. So back to the compromise- He has to spend time with me and I will tell him when to get off that game. Well It worked for two weekends but the minute I come back to my house- he plays it non-stop until he goes to work. He looks like an addict when I see him- he needs a fix- So here I am. At my home trying to figure out what to do next. I love him- he is a good man- the only bad thing about him is this game- He loves the kids so much- is a good provider- has a good job and is totally unselfish about eveyhting but EQ. He seems to think it is real that he owes these fake people something. Anyway I will make a decison soon.... I will not look back. I can forgive but not forget the many times he has left me for that game. So he may just have to count on his guild to take care of him when he gets old and sick because the kids are tired of him and I am getting there."

Here is an extended email communication with someone who has been on both of the issue:

"I sat down and started playing the game one day. At first he said "see honey, it's fun!!! But the first night he went to bed alone!!!!!! You would have thought the world was coming to an end. I was evil. The second time I got an "Are you gonna play that damn game all night" :) So what do you do? prove you are better than him and get up and go to bed or basque in the glory of his frustration? Well I got such a kick out of the whole thing I went to bed. Didn't even throw in a now you know how it feels (yet). I wanted to drag it out a while. When he didn't get dinner or have clean underwear? It got worse. The third time he went to bed alone we finally had it out. He got up at 3 am and I was still no the game. He threw a fit. It was the funniest thing. I was eating it up (probably not healthy but it felt good) Even when he was playing and got in bed at some ungodly hour I was there waiting. Now I have the nerve to let him go to bed alone! Hypocrite.

Anyway he got my point. He plays less and I still play sometimes. We are in the same guild so we play with the same people. At least we have something in common. 90% of our conversations are about armor, spells, or leveling up. But we talk now, a lot. We seem to "like" each other more.

I had decided "If you can't beat em, join em". May not have been the right answer. And I wouldn't even recommend it. I now understand how addictive it can be, and he understands how it feels to be on the outside and neglected (well as much as he is able to understand). But the only other option was divorce. I figured I would try this for a while.

The main difference now is I still work, cook, clean, do laundry and take care of the kids, play with the kids, etc. I play after they are in bed. I understand priorities and I make myself earn my play time. He hasn't gotten that point yet."

A follow-up email:

"I had to check out the site and the opening remarks about "if you think you are someone who can play eq responsibly.." made me think. Of course I do!!!!!!!!!!!!

At least I thought I was playing responsibly, in comparison to my husband I am, but after analyzing the situation further, in reality I'm not. I "try" to only play when the kids are in bed and usually only one or two nights a week and a little on the weekend, but if there is a HQ group scheduled or other event (and I am able to get HIM off the computer) then I'm there. To justify playing I would make myself "earn"
my play time. If I'm not playing EQ I'm cleaning or helping with homework or playing with the kids or doing his yard work. So I thought I had it under control. When he's not on he's laying on the bed watching TV. But my house isn't as clean as it used to be, the laundry pile is bigger than it used to be, the fridge really needs to be cleaned out, we won't talk about my car, I haven't taken the kids to the park or a movie in a while or to see their grandparents. So in just the few months I've been
playing "RESPONSIBLY" life has gone even farther downhill.

Anyway after reading the blogs yesterday I actually considered going home and just deleting my character. I don't want to be to my kids what he has been to me for the past year. I don't want them to feel what I felt before I started playing. I don't ever want them to think they don't come before the game. But I have a feeling in the past few months there have been a few times where they may have felt that way.

But, I didn't delete the character. I didn't play or have any desire to play last night (just one night). Baby steps right? I looked at him sitting in the chair from the time he got home to the time he went to bed. Not sure he even spoke to the kids, and I just thought how PATHETIC is that. Then I thought to myself..that was you Friday night. Did the kids stand behind me thinking the same thing?"

And her last email (I sent a response following her email but forgot to save it ... the gist of the message was about how it's not about stopping gaming but finding balance in life):

".... I actually feel better knowing I wasn't as in control as I thought and that I am going to do better. My husband plays so much that I really don't get on much but when I do I'll stay up till 1 am and then try to get up for work at 5 or 6. And If I wasn't on I was thinking about it. Thinking of excuses to go home from work early to get some uninterupted play time. It's crazy. Just glad that I've "hopefully" come to my senses. Didn't play again last night. Everyone went to bed early and I thought about it, but I didn't.

They put me in charge of our Heritage Quests. So I have a duty that I feel responsible for. I think that is what really drew me in I went from playing once in
a while to...I have to get on to see if they need something!! Update the web page, etc etc. They got along fine before I came and they will get along after.

It is a good escape so I am sure I still will play. I've never played video, computer or online games, so I can't believe I got sucked in so easily. My husband
has an addictive personality and has played games his entire life, he played 7 hour after he got home yesterday without pause, just tossed him his dinner and he was happy. I'm sure he is enjoying my decision to cut back though I haven't mentioned it. The kids are happier and kept busy, the house is clean, everyone is fed and he can enjoy his life in Norrath."

For those who aren't tired of the

"MMOGs are EVIL!" -"No! It's your OWN FAULT" debate...

So far the most intelligent discussion of online gaming obsessiveness that I've seen. (based on this story)

Why can't we just all just simply agree that MMOGs' immersiveness encourages compulsiveness ?

Hmmm... Google API, what to do, what to do... of course, it's natural to work on something that relates to your world... and for some, that world appears to be virtual.... Google Map of World of Warcraft

And if you need any further proof that WoW and MMOGs in general are becoming more mainstream:

-- WORLD OF WARCRAFT HITS EUROPEAN MILESTONE (February 6, 2006): "...surpassed the one million customer milestone in Europe, more than quadrupling the previously estimated size of the entire European MMORPG market since its launch in February 2005.... Worldwide, the game has a growing audience of more than 5.5 million customers..."

-- I recently saw a preview of a movie called "Stay Alive", about a group of teenagers who play this videogame and find out that they die when their characters die... well, the typical horror schlock movie. The plot summary and trailer can be be found at ComingSoon.net. I haven't figured out if the game is supposedly an MMOG or not but the friends seem to be playing it with each other over the Internet.

From the WoW Forum:

"1. Serious Aggro Managers - The Guide.
1/17/2006 9:38:44 AM PST by Qil

We've all seen the threads, "Nerf Shamans", "Nerf Hunters", "Nerf so and so." Yea yea, this isn't one of those threads. If running while seeing only gray was as bad as it got, I wouldn't have sat down to tell you about the undisputed ruler of overpowered classes. You guessed it, the Wife.

I shall attempt to explain my strategy on dealing with this class, and discuss a bit about her skills. Let me tell you, she got skills you ain't seen yet. Molten Core, Onyxia, Ahn' Qiraj ...ppfffft. Easy Mode. Any noob with elite gear, buffs, and an army beside them can tackle the mobs in these places. But to truly rank as a Master Player in the World of Warcraft, you must find a way to handle the Wife or you WILL be PWNED without exception. PWNED as in "more than owned. Owned, you just pick yourself up after regaining consciousness. Wife PWNED: you have your mates collect your parts in a duffle bag.

Wife Strategies

Lets face it you and I both know that if you want to avoid a mob, you gotta manage to not draw their aggro. This is a simple and fundamental rule of WoW. So the first area we'll explore is:

Managing Wife Aggro
Things you must know about Wife aggro are:

The mob has a radius of about 100 feet, or the average maximum dimension of a standard house lot. Wife aggro doesn’t diminish if you're at a different elevation or behind a barrier. It sees through and around all obstacles. If you're on the same property, you may be drawing aggro and not even know it.

The Wife is essentially a patrol. You never know where they come from or how long their patrol lasts. They respawn with regularity. They change direction seemingly without pattern. And worst of all they vary their speed and areas of focus often. Basically, think unpredictable with a capital UN.

Here are some initial steps to reduce the Aggro radius.

Stealth: This is your basic tactic, and you should be in this mode at all times. Stealth mode is an art. It requires rapid use of the Alt-Tab key combination, volume control, and engaging in one of your primary or secondary professions quickly. Hear the garage door roll up? Quick say good-bye to your group, Alt-Tab, drink a mug of TV Sound Buffer, and begin channeling: Chore Diversion.

Chore Diversion: Once you have exited stealth mode and you are within the radius of Wife Aggro, Chore Diversion is clearly your best option for minimizing Wife Aggro. The easiest of these is Dish Management. A few quick steps toward your nearest stack of dishes, some moderate clanking noises and a quick /How was your day? is almost a foolproof method to maintain minimal aggro. I try to keep dishes in stacks of 10 nearby so that I'll always have the ability to channel Chore Diversion at a moments notice.

Other notable subclasses of Chore Diversion include:
Blessing of Laundry Management.
Aura of Dusting.
Focus of Dog Brushing.
Stinky Trash Launch.
Cone of Bathroom Facilities Maintenance.

As a side note here there are really only two professions you can take to be even passable at Wife Aggro management. Herbalism is great because picking weeds is always a good chore diversion and can be done at just about any time. Enchanting is the most popular with the elite Wife Aggro managers, because fixing stuff up goes a long way in reducing Wife aggro. It takes more time to do, and it's much harder to Feign Enchanting when coming out of Stealth mode, but give it some time and you'll find that this works almost as good as Seduction.

Subtlety: Subtlety is similar to Stealth but you are able to continue questing at a much slower pace with significantly added danger. This can be done when the Wife is on the phone, in the shower, or other thing that take you completely out of the Wife aggro radius for intermittent times. If the Wife is about to embark on an exercise regime, you may have 1/2 hour or more to quest before the Wife aggro radius envelopes you once again. Trust me, you better be able to stealth and channel Chore Diversion quickly my friend. Hot key these now.

Dinner Sap: This is one of the specialized elite Wife aggro control skill but it can only be used at night and has about a 24 hour cool down. It's another channeled skill and it will take you out of combat for at least an hour. However once you're done you will be well fed and your wife will be in a stunned state (lasts usually 1/2 hour to 2 hours, depending on getting a Wine Crit during channeling.

Long Walk Mind Control: This skill is often used directly after the Dinner Sap. It takes a considerable amount of skill to do this effectively and requires the ability to employ the right emote at the right time during the Long Walk. Let's just say, you definitely need to throw down a /hug if the Wife tells you of a particularly troubling event during the day. A poorly timed /lol will land you in the Dog House after a Stink Eye crit faster that you can say "Honey?" We'll discuss these Wife Elite Skills further later on. Ultimately the Long Walk Mind Control is used as a precursor to getting the wife to take care of some of her own business immediately after and allowing you some time to employ subtlety and play for an hour or two.

Seduction: This is a skill that you now have racked up enough combo points for and you are hoping for a massive crit. Assume (correctly) that you get a combo point for each of the previously used skills of Stealth, Subtlety, Chore Diversion, Dinner Sap, and Long Walk Mind Control. Take those 5 combo points and use 'em quick. You only have about an hour after the Long Walk Mind Control to use Seduction before the combo points start to fade so don't wait on this skill to long. Buff with Light of Candle, and always repair and clean your armor. If possible, use Seduction, kite, then Seduction so that you can throw down Chain Seduction for as long as you have mana.

If you are lucky enough to get a crit while chaining Seduction, you may get the Wife to Sleep (you've just landed a crit). This will allow you time for your mana bar to regen, and you may get 6 to 8 hours of late night play time. If you're like me, this is the best time to attempt an instance. That sleep is usually sound and won't break for a good long time. Keep little adds and patrols controlled once you land one of these.

Vacation AoE Channeling: Much like saving for a mount or that killer piece of armor, you're going to have to save up for the ultimate in expensive Wife Aggro Management tool, the AoE Vacation. Once you begin channeling this, you'll be out of combat for at least 3 days, and up to 2 weeks in some cases. The bonus to this is that you will probably get up to 2 days of uninterrupted play time when the channeling is completed. This can be extended by offering to (Chore Diversion) do the laundry upon return. You may even have enough laundry to extend a play session deep into the night. When you get back from AoE Vacation, you should be at a full blue bar if you're below 60 so you'll be catching up faster than normal.

Now let's take some time to discuss:

Wife Elite Skills

This class has some of the most feared skills in the game and you would be wise to learn all the nuances of the Wife you're facing. Almost every wife starts out with a awesome racial trait:

+200 to throwing skills: Should you draw aggro, this is the one that poses the most immediate risk to your survival. Avoid everything that's coming your way, and don't be a noob and grab something and throw it back, you'll never lose aggro that way. Run. This is your only option. Run fast, run far, drink lots, return when the Wife is sleeping or on patrol somewhere else.

Now for some combat skill that may be used during your upcoming conflict:

Stink Eye: This is the initial curse used universally by Wives when they find out you're playing World of Warcraft. This can place you into the Dog House, a snare that usually lasts between 8 and 24 hours. This means you've drawn Wife aggro and should be preparing for the following attacks.

Cold Shoulder: You will be iced by the Wife, which will give you the false impression that you are moving when in actuality, you're going nowhere. It's a snare and a DoT all in one. Immediately cast Chore Diversion or Dinner Sap or your in for a whoopin’.

Mind Control: When the Wife starts talking you into a situation where it will be impossible to use either Subtlety or Stealth, she's using Mind Control. This is a DoT spell that builds over time. She'll kite you to a chick flick, one of your kid's functions, a Bunko night at a Wives encampment, or the ultimate in smack downs - Shopping. Aak!! Avoid this skill at all costs. Offer Dinner Sap right away. Feign Chore Diversion. Stealth. Get thee away poor warrior, the enemy is using you.

Soul Drain: This is another DoT that can be cast concurrently with Mind Control. If you find yourself watching the Dr. Phil Show at a mall with a latte in your hands, you're being Soul Drained. Combined with Mind Control, there is very little defense. You may just want to die and rez back at a graveyard. Watch yourself here, Wives are notorious corpse campers.

Lash of Power Cord: An instant cast stun and damage dealer that will likely put you in a gray world. Jerking the power cord free of the PC has a 100% crit chance. When the Wife equips the power cord in her off hand and wags her finger with her main hand, you know you've fully pulled all Wife aggro and are headed for a wipe. Hopefully you can reduce aggro by saying "I guess I'm done. Care for a Long Walk?"

Summon Adds: So you've acquired Wife aggro and the battle is not going well. It gets worse fast if she decides to Summon Adds by calling her sister and getting moral support for her state of aggro. This is a direct damage spell that pummels you and heals her. If the battle gets to this, you may have to spam Dinner Sap on the whole extended family. This will drain your backpack but you may be able to find some time for Stealth or Subtlety afterward.

Reverse Seduction: This is the ultimate devious scheme and probably the most effective way for the Wife to take you completely out of combat. She will drain your mana, sap your life and when she crits, you'll be sleeping for a long, long while.

Feign Banish: By the time you get to this point in the battle, it's not looking good and you're searching the world for a heal and somebody to help you crowd control. When the Feign Banish curse gets thrown on you by the Wife, you are in a desperate state. Dramatic action is needed. It may be time for an AoE Vacation. A long one. Things are getting ugly. Find an inn and acquire blue bar cause the Mob you're facing is skulls to you and you really have no chance.

Banish: This is the ultimate weapon, and direct damage spell that also deals damage over time, and is irresistible, not dispellable, and the trinkets that you need to stop this are only available to end game players that are ready to hang up their honor ranking and head off into the sunset of MMORPGS. You cannot win. Look for a new place to hearth to, because you have forfeited your hearthstone. You wanna know when this game ends? You will soon find out. Basically, you're screwed. Avoid this at all costs.

Closing Comments

I hope this guide is helpful. I'm not sure it applies to everyone here in the WoW community but there are enough of us out there that face this Mob on a daily basis. There are many similar mobs on the way to this instance and negotiating these is a similar feat but can often be mind controlled into harmlessness. Be carefule here, the Girlfriend, Significant Other, and Date mobs you face are just getting you combat ready.

Those of you that play with your significant other I say "Good job and kudos." You'll never face the ultimate class in WoW but I'm sure you'll get in more uninterrupted time. Those of you who operate outside this instance, I can only assume you're too low a level, a noob, or a gold farmer not willing to take that risk.

Thanks for your time."

"I finally quit playing EQ around 2 months ago after about 3 years of playing. Like smoking when I was (a lot) younger, I simply lost interest in it and all MMORPGs (I was playing Eve Online for a couple of months too).

Reading some of the stories of relationships destroyed helped a lot towards my change of attitude. I love my girlfriend very much and didn't want to do what others had done to their partners. I know she wasn't happy with me playing but she tolerated it in moderation. I did have the capacity to play to excess when she wasn't around though.

I don't consider myself to have an addictive nature, but I was in some way addicted to EQ. It has a very powerful attraction to it of not being real and therefore allowing you to do things you cannot, and could not normally do, in real life. It imbues you with a (false) sense of power and achievement which is very seductive. Your achievements carry with them kudos and recognition in the game world which may be, and probably are, lacking in your day-to-day wage slavery. In the game world you can be someone special.

However, I finally realised that what I was achieving was, in real terms, nothing. Absolutely nothing. I would have nothing to show for the hours wasted in the game world. I may as well have been sleeping. And that was what finally clinched it for me."

"I ... lived with my EQA boyfriend and 8 months after moving in, my daughter and i moved out. I blame most of our problems on the game...he wasnt always like this, thats why i have stuck around. I didnt think he was an "addict" at first either, until i came hear and realized that i was not the only one going thru this and that his personality traits, that i once loved had vanished and he was like all these other EQA's i was reading about. He was on a break from the game when we met and then ASKED me if he could play...i said yes not knowing what it was...i could kick myself in the ass now...i thought this was the man i was going to marry, i sometimes still think or maybe wish that he could/would be that man. We decided 2 days ago to try and work this out...this was after he decided 2 weeks ago he needed a "break" from me...well, I thought things were gonna change...he took last night off from the game and let me cook him dinner, and tonight I was child-free and thought we could actually have a date night...well once again, i lost to land of Norrath...god forbid he NOT play 2 days in a row...what would the freakin guild do with out him...he says to me, why can't you just accept the fact that i like to play this game"..well, there is a HUGE difference between liking something and being addicted or obsessed to it."