"I am a former EQ addict who quit originally back in 2000. I've been reading many of the posts here and have really felt bad seeing all the pain caused from the people addicted to the game. It's a horrible form of addiction because its effects are as real as any gambling or alcoholism but the outside world doesn't understand it.

When I quit the game I had just finished flunking out of my first year in college and had to come to terms with a life of little social skills as well as parents who had felt just as betrayed as perhaps many of you feel by your spouses. While my experience did not involve any online relationships, I thought I could perhaps simply bring the other side of things to fuller light.

I'm sure it is very tempting to give up. I've seen posts where people said they had spent years trying to get through to their spouses with no luck. People addicted to games (EQ in particular) do not admit to it by I assure you they do acknowledge it.

Like any addiction, without proper help it is near impossible to help someone. An alcoholic will not get better just because his family wills it; more likely than not he will need professional help.

The big problem lies with a lack of professional help available for this form of addiction. The academic and professional counselling world for the most part discredits the idea, though some awakenning has happened. (http://www.nickyee.com/hub/home.html).

The reason for this post is to simply make some of you aware that while it may seem like it is time to call it quits, realize that perhaps the type of help you've been trying to give is not powerful enough to get through. While I quit after being kicked out of college in the summer of 2000, I had many relapses after that. Even after being blessed with forgiving parents, whose trust I eventually regained overtime, and a second chance at college, I was still unable to control myself and went back every so often. It wasn't until I finally received free professional help at my new college two years ago that I was finally able to kick the habbit for good.

That was the key. I would urge everyone not to underestimate the power of a professional. For me it was not the professional herself, but rather the ritual of going every week and eventually, through her helpful questions, talking my way into realizing what DROVE my desire for playing. I helped myself, but I required a conduit that had an authoritative presence."

"He began playing WOW during beta testing (he played various other games before it came out) and I played a bit myself and got addicted as well until I had a similar wakeup call to what you described ..., and I dropped down to playing maybe 1-3 hours a week and sometimes a couple of weeks will go by when I don't play at all. (It is so hard to resist sometimes, but I know what is most important in my life)

One thing that really opened my eyes to how much time I was wasting was to use the "/played" command in the game. It will tell you exactly how may hours the character has been played down to the seconds. I have checked my husband's ... and it says about 24 days of game time has been spent on that specific character. That's 24
days of 24 hours each, so in about a three month period he has spent 576 hours of that time on that one character. That's not counting his level 20 ... or his level 15 ... or his level 16 ... or and of the other various leveled characters he has. Also it doesn't count all the time he spends on reading the web pages and message boards about the game. I know that many people here have addicts that play even more than this and my heart truly goes out to you.

It really makes me sick to think of all the time wasted on this. My husband does not have a job and we have been struggling our whole marriage with finances. I am a freelance ... and the majority of our income has been from my efforts. We have a ... girl and a ... boy, and I feel like I am raising them on my own most of the time.

I just try to survive emotionally and physically from day to day the best I can and be there for my kids."

"My hubby started playing almost as soon as WoW came out. Recovering from being a SOCOM II and Final Fantasy Online widow I really tried hard to not get him the game and so I held out till about Christmas....but then his really good friend got it for him....

At first it wasn't so bad, he was getting really addicted and I so didn't understand. I would constantly talk to him about it and get angry 'n such...so he decided that I needed to play to so that I could understand him better. I decided our marriage was worth it, so I joined.

When I joined he was already like 15 levels ahead of me but he was so enthusastic about me playing and excited and helped me level up and stuff that it actually felt good and I felt like at least we were doing it together and I was a part of this crazy gaming world of his.

I got addicted too. I found myself one day sort of 'waking up' after like 12 hours of playing this game. I realized that that week I hadn't cleaned, I hadn't paid any bills and ....the worst thing ... I didn't answer a phone call from my mom. (All my family is in Canada....I live here in the US with my husband and his family as my only family). When I realized what this game had turned me into I immediately quit. I was dreaming about the game, wanting to get back on......wow did i ever understand my husband!

But seeing myself reduced to that...I also realized how sickened I was by the addiction and disgusted that I could become that sort of person. Thank goodness we don't have children....

So anyways...my situation is this: I still play from time to time..I'm a lvl 31 undead warlock. But I try to play maybe once a week or so (because it never fails to make me stay on for like over 5 hrs at a time..which i Hate). My husband is now a level 57 undead rogue and still as addicted as always.

The only thing is that now he can't lie to me anymore. That's something I realized too...he used to lie to me (like saying 'oh baby I can't pause the game, I'm not safe' and I'd believe him) and now I can totally debate about how long it actually takes to get to a safe spot and stuff and basically judge when he actually CAN pause the game or not.

Likewise I know that when he says 'oh baby, I'm just going to do this instance really quick' I know that means like 3-4 hours because no instance is short. So...I have the lingo pretty down pat and I find that SOOO helpful.

Even armed with that though, I still feel lonely often. I have chosen to ... totally let him know how I feel. The thing is, he doesn't see it as wrong. For him it's his way of having 'down time' whereas I watch tv for mine."

Here is a recently published article predicting the demise of World of Warcraft in the near future. The interesting part is that it partially addresses the trend that I mentioned a little while ago, how MMORPG players are moving from WoW to EQ2 in an attempt continue maintaining an interest in playing MMORPGs. So does this mean that the characteristics of WoW that promote less grinding and saves the player from spending countless months and years on the game (aka "addiction") is in fact THE primary factors of continuous player motivation?

Geldonyetich Doomcasts World of Warcraft

Kid Named After Everquest Character:
"Sony Online Entertainment just sent notice that some poor baby has been named after a character in EverQuest. Apparently players really, really love this game. Case in point: player Tabitha Ayers gave birth to a baby girl January 6, 2005, and promptly named her Firiona Vie Ayers, in honor of EverQuest's famous spokes-elf. The path to geekdom for this child has aready been paved in 12-sided dice and character sheets."

"At one time I was dismissive of the concept of compulsive gaming, as many MMORPG gamers are. A friend of my fiancee was carrying in groceries one day when she either fell or struck her leg on the car, not sure which. Well, she was able to get the kids and groceries rounded up with some difficulty, and proceded to lay herself down on the couch. Unfortunately, it didnt stop hurting and after an hour or so she asked her husband to take her to the hospital. Well, apparently her side of the story is that he was playing EQ and couldn't take her. Eventually, at 3AM, she called my fiancee so she could be driven to the hospital. As it turns out there wasnt anything seriously wrong with her, but I found her husband's behavior rather odd. I know that if I were playing UO or WoW and something like that happened, the raid I was on would just have to wait for next time. I've always thought it more a case of her husband's lack of concern than compulsive gaming, but take the story as you will."

Everquest has Pizza, so World of Warcraft now offers Chinese food via "/panda".

http://worldofwarcraft.com/info/underdev/pandaren-xpress.html

"Imagine you are on an instance run in Maraudon, Dire Maul, or even Blackrock Spire. Two long hours into the dungeon and you suddenly notice the hunter in your group feeding his pet. That triggers a rumbling in your belly, which reminds you that you haven't eaten anything all day! How can you satisfy your craving without abandoning your group?! Before, there was nothing for you to do but suffer in hunger. Now, thanks to Pandaren Xpress®, creators of low-priced gourmet meals, you no longer have to leave the group for a food break. In less time than it takes your party's casters to regain mana (even less if you don't have a mage), you can order Chinese take-out from the comfort of your chair! No more tedious walking over to the telephone! No more arduous pushing of unfamiliar phone numbers!

...

Our friendly staff is standing by to prepare your order 24 hours a day. If your food isn't delivered in 30mins by a person dressed in a Pandaren costume, you eat FREE!"

Then again, it sounds too much like an April Fools' joke. Thankfully, some game PR people have humour... and I'm starting to wonder if that's what happened at EQ: "*sarcasm on* why don't we let players order pizza through the game?" - "That's terrific! A salary raise for you!" - "Umm, ok."