It's 10 pm. Do you know where you and your loved ones are? Here is a collection of experiences from those who live / have lived with an obsessive MMOG gamer and from those who have lived the experience of obsessive MMOG gaming.

Monday, December 13, 2004

"For years now, my husband has been playing mmorpgs constantly. First, dark ages of camelot, then starwars galaxies, now EQ2. Its like he has to complete so many goals, and has to be online at least hours a day to get 'anything done' as he calls it. Its hard to watch the person you love lose themself in a fantasy world. Some gaming is fine, everything in moderation. . .but its these type of people that take things to the extreme.

My favorite conversation between him and I occured a few weeks ago. We were doing great, no gaming, lots of family time, etc. Then EQ2 came out. He went crazy and started playing hardcore. He was upset that I was bothered by his constant gaming. His philosophy is that he is going to do what he wants to do in life, and that I should do the same. I agree to a point, but whats the point of being married then? Shouldn't we have a few of the same goals in life? I think he was just trying to get me to back off, so he can revel in his alternative reality. Meanwhile there are dishes to be washed, laundry to do, and a baby to feed! After that conversation, I realized that yes I am going to do whatever the hell I want. I put the baby in his lap, and leave to go shopping. I make him get off the computer, because I WANT to check my email. I have turned this whole thing around so he can see how ridiculous he is being. So far its working. . .his game time is two hours a day, something I can deal with.

So here's my advice to you chicas who are going through this too....engross yourself in your life and making your own life better. If your bf/gf/hb don't want to join you, that's their loss. Eventually you will realize you love yourself more than them and if they haven't come around, you may leave. It might be the wake up call they need."


Anonymous Anonymous said...

My only comment to what you are saying is yes we have to get our own lives back. I have been dealing with this same issue with my boyfriend for quite sometime and didnt noticed it really until I moved in. It is not that they dont want to spend time with us or dont love us any more, but they are so engrossed in the competition and levels that they are trying to reach. I am finding myself having the same conversation each week asking him to get off the game just to spend some time with me. I think the most common complaint with all who is connected with a 'gamer' is the fact, that when we selected to marry or be with someone, it is to be as a partner and best friend. It is upsetting that we have to resort to doing 'things on our own', but life in a 'gamers' world has turned to just that. I have selected that the best thing for me to do is move out and not subject myself to watching the gaming go on for hours. If my boyfriend wants to spend time or look up long enough to realize I am gone, then things will work, but if I personally continue to have to do things on my own--it will be just that.

Dec 15, 2004, 7:04:00 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Being a "addict" as it seems most people here refer to some of us as I have played more than my fair share of MMORPGS. I played COH (City of Heroes) and I now play WoW (World of Warcraft). I have never and will never play EQ or the spawn of it EQ2. No desire.

Has any of these games taken over my life?
Yes and no...
I am a full-time worker, full-time student, I just got engaged to be married and I go to the gym three to four times a week. Throughout all of this, I still have time to play my game. My fiancé let's me play, for she knows that I enjoy it and she likes the time to herself. We have developed our relationship around the fact that I like to take my time to play my games and she takes her time to do her blogging and pamper herself.

Am I an addict?

Yes and no again...

I played yesterday for 6 hours. That was on Sunday. But before, during and after those six hours, I had dinner with my bride to be, cleaned my house, woke my bride up and made her coffee and breakfast, and help to take care of the house. So people who do play these games can accomplish other things too.

Like anything in your life, you need to do it with moderation. Playing every night right now is something I can do, but when I go back to school (Winter break) my time will be cut.

I have told my bride to be that if she ever needs me or feels that the game is taking away from her time with me, I will stop the game and spend it with her and I have had no trouble doing that so far.

Self control... and prioritizing that is the key.

Finally... Ladies, if the man you are with will not and can not put the mouse and keyboard down, then they are not worth your time. If you love them, then make them get off the game. We are slow and at times well, stupid, but we wise up quickly....

Jan 9, 2005, 9:14:00 PM


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