It's 10 pm. Do you know where you and your loved ones are? Here is a collection of experiences from those who live / have lived with an obsessive MMOG gamer and from those who have lived the experience of obsessive MMOG gaming.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Another story arrived in the mailbox today. Thank you.

You brought up point that I have not commented on much but may have some significance: loneliness. Is one of the reasons why people spend hours and hours online because they want to feel less alone in this world?

"Hello, this is another story of MMOG addiction only that this time it's from the addict's point of view. Let me start by saying that I'm 19 years old and currently working as a programmer.

It all starts back in the early High School, I was an excellent student, I had goals in my life and you could call me a good looking guy. At that time I started playing games at my free time, situation wasn't very bad I was just having my fun. Later on I discovered online games and the experience was much better. This kept going on and every year that passed I would find a new game and I would get even worse addiction. At my last year of high-school were my exams were the most critical of all the years I was very badly addicted with a MMOG. School, Comptuer, Sleep. That was my schedule. At that time I lost a girl that cared for me, I lost most of my friends because I was never there for them, I stopped being a good looking guy because I never exercised and I lost a lot of weight. In the end I failed in my exams, got in a low-grade university and gave up my dream of being an Engineer. After that the summer that followed I got the game called World of Warcraft. I played and played and played and played. At some point I had played around 100 hours in 1 week. Then I left, for 2 months I went away from my city to a place where I didn't have a computer. In the beggining I was very bored a bit later though I got used to it, made a few new friends and had a nice summer. Then I returned home and the addiction kept going. Around 1 month after summer I got a job which limited my playtime to around 4-5 hours a day. Now 3 months later I still got my job and I still raid almost everynight. I'm still alone and I still hate myself for doing this. Why don't you stop you might say? Well I believe that's the point of my whole mail.

I have asked myself many times: Do I like this life? No I don't. Many times I've thought to log on my account and destroy all the items on my hunter and delete the character itself (that character IS one of the best equipped in game) but then I think: "Then what?"
What am I going to do after I stop playing? I don't have friends, I don't have someone to care for me. My life will be even emptier after that. We live in a world of fashion. A world where you got to be trendy to be liked, I'm not that. I hate how all the people wear masks and hide behind them the same way we hide behind our characters in-game. They talk shit for a "friend" of theirs and when that "friend" arrives they kiss him and talk with him.

I'm really sad that I've given up the life I once had because the friendships I had were real and not with people wearing masks.I wish I could have it back but you can't go back in time can you? I guess I'll keep playing, maybe one day something will make me change but untill then I don't want to be more alone than I already am because believe it or not when we "talk to the computer", we do actually talk to real persons that keep us company when we stay up at nights playing."


Blogger The Seeker said...

You remind me of me too much. Although I never had an addiction for MMORPGs (I lived in a different age) I did have a gaming addiction and an unsocial character.
I believe you have to take baby steps and it isn't easy. Try to take 1 hour off gaming each day to go out and meet people.
Call a friend that you know still cares for you (You must have someone left) and go out for coffee or something.
If you start taking things slowly, it will be easier to rehabilitate.

Dec 12, 2005, 10:57:00 PM

Blogger chocowafer said...

You said you don't want to make friends because people are fake and they hide behind a "mask." Think about the irony in that. Playing MMORPG is like hiding behind your computer. I know quitting stings a little, but I was addicted to WoW too, but I'm getting married and have to prepare for my final exams in my graduate program. I'm lucky that my fiancee is very tolerant of the addiction, but she was adamant about her displeasure when I play it. At some time you just need to take your stand and quit. Go jogging, go to the gym, go out with your co-workers, call up your old friends and hang out.

You may have the best equipped hunter in the game, but so what? So you can show off to other people on your server? Can you physically touch your equipment? Think about the "end-game" of your life, are people in the real world going to say "Wow, you have the whole Dragonstalker Set, you are a successful person!" No, they probably will say, "Wow, you spent A LOT of time on the game..."

Dec 13, 2005, 8:48:00 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I play WOW but my gaming is very casual. I enjoy it but it has and will never replace "living". The main thing that scares me about your situation is how sad you are. Your talking about how fake people are in real life when what your doing is all fake. In fact one of the things that I find hysterical are people who are in game and act hostile toward me or others. That in itself is fake because they are hidden behind a screen. In real terms I would guarantee they would not do anything so totally negative. Anyway your only 19 and your life is still in front of you. Life things such as love, friendships with actual contact, sex, family, ball games, plays and movies, etc are still out there for you. Get busy living...and quit dying only to be rezzed..for nothing.

Dec 21, 2005, 1:00:00 PM


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