It's 10 pm. Do you know where you and your loved ones are? Here is a collection of experiences from those who live / have lived with an obsessive MMOG gamer and from those who have lived the experience of obsessive MMOG gaming.

Sunday, September 19, 2004

"The more hobbies/distractions that I have, the less time I will spend depressing about the damage being done. So, getting more hobbies is, coincidentally, what my husband also encourages me to do. Another thing he encourages me to do is get plenty of sleep (a good thing, right?!) so that I will even be UNCONSCIOUS while he plays his games. By the way, scrapbooking is also a hobby of mine, however I find it very difficult to separate the joys right now from the heartache. He is supposed to be part of the joy and he is currently opting out of much of it. I often feel like I don't WANT to preserve many of the memories I have about these last few months.

I do have many hobbies and am constantly keeping busy both inside and outside of the home. I am fortunate to be spoiled by a very easy 1st child who doesn't require my constant attention 24/7. I have never had to go without taking a shower (lucky me, I guess!) and while it is a challenge to keep up with all the housework all the time, I give myself some slack. I am already involved in a play group with other moms and babies and will even start ... "baby music class" .... All of this is supposed to help me socialize with other adults while also spending quality time with my son. I manage to keep my calendar pretty well booked with visits to friends and errands that I hardly have time during the day to depress about EQ. It is at night, when the man I love and want to spend time with more than anyone or anything else, comes home and barricades himself in his office so he can spend the next 5-6 hours pretending he's a dwarf or a whatever, that really causes me to blow a fuse. I can hardly stand to see the room where he devotes himself to something that is causing us to become disconnected with each other. I feel like I'm a roommate, not a wife. Yet, when he first returned to work following the birth of the baby, he had the audacity to be hurt that I wasn't standing in the doorway waiting for him. He wasn't concerned about having meals together or spending the evening with each other. He just wants me to BE a picture hanging on the wall. I am his wife, another goal he has checked off of his "to-do" list in life. I guess his son is another goal he has now checked off. Only, we're not through. He wants several more children, so he can check them off, too, and then I can be so busy that I will never have time to bother him about how he spends his time. That will never happen. My marriage and family are priority #1 for me, and no matter how busy I am or how entertaining my hobbies might otherwise be, I will always be most concerned with making this marriage last. Is it possible to be too concerned with what is most important to me and what he says in words is also important to him?"


Blogger Omni said...

Maybe if you refuse to have sex with him on any day he wasted time with games, he might change his behavior?

Sep 22, 2004, 4:53:00 PM

Blogger J said...

Has refusing sex ever helped a woman get what they want? :D

Sep 22, 2004, 9:16:00 PM

Blogger Job said...

Hi J,
I just came across your blog and I must say that I was an EQ addict for a while (throughout my high school years). It sounds like you have a lot of things to "fill" your life up with, but nothing that is really meaningful. Of course the one thing you desire, your husband, which can satisfy is not exactly doing his part. I'm just wondering if you have any faith to fall back on or perhaps a support group? Anyways I want you to know that there is at least one guy out here who understands what your going through (just to dispell any thoughts your having, I'm not trying to set any pick up lines or anything, I'm actually engaged). I know what EQ does to players and the people around the player. I will be praying for you and if you ever want some sort of venting arena feel free to shoot it my way :)
An empathetic friend

Sep 26, 2004, 11:50:00 PM

Blogger J said...

Thanks :)

Sep 30, 2005, 8:48:00 PM


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