tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post112317690844893034..comments2023-08-29T08:19:40.509-07:00Comments on Everquest Daily Grind: MMORPG Infinity (no beyond): Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1125554966370537852005-08-31T23:09:00.000-07:002005-08-31T23:09:00.000-07:00I think some of you are missing the point a little...I think some of you are missing the point a little, by focusing too much on one game. I, am probably addicted to games, not just online ones. I'll go home in a few hours and fire up some game or another for a few hours, then probably make tea for me and the boys, and then either watch a bit of TV and then go back to the computer 'till 4am or something. My boyfriend isn't quite as bad as me, because he's going to Uni atm, and because there's technically only one computer (which has an effect on my sleeping patterns because I use it at night while he's sleeping etc).<BR/><BR/>I'm now 23. I got my first computer when i was 10 - therefore i have been gaming for more then half my life. Currently, I'd say i'm going through my worst phase of gaming addiction due to the fact that i moved to the city, got broadband, a new computer, finished my tertiary course in Multimedia (which usually involved hours of game playing), and now can't find a job. So i sit at home playing games.<BR/><BR/>Also, in single player games i will often restart, because i like to start over multiple times because of the different ways to do it - ie stay away from random variable games that are quite often turn-based (many hours lost there). In online games, I tend to find that I keep playing because my character becomes important in some way (guild leader, captain of infantry, CEO of online corp) and I therefore feel responsible for the fun and enjoyment and game flow of other people as well as my self.<BR/><BR/>Sigh. Enough.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1125087975298798072005-08-26T13:26:00.000-07:002005-08-26T13:26:00.000-07:00not trying to take inventories but the above psych...not trying to take inventories but the above psychologist sounds like he/she is trying to justify their own behavior. Addiction to MMORPG's is just as serious as drug or alcohol addiction. In fact after having read a multitude of the posts found on this site, i have found that the symptoms are infact the same. The problem is chronic, progressive and it affects every facet of the addicts life including primary relationships, jobs, finances, self image, health etc . . . and the problem should be regarded as a serious matter, not something that the significant other should just accept or join in the same behavior. just my two centsAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1124805003071893112005-08-23T06:50:00.000-07:002005-08-23T06:50:00.000-07:00I think there is one way, and then there is anothe...I think there is one way, and then there is another way. One way is to aim for a balance in life, getting to do what you want to do and at the same time respecting that the other person gets to do what they want to do as well. The other way is to ignore the other person and to fulfill one's needs only. There are some MMORPG gamers that can do the former, while there are also some that can only do the latter. Doesn't mean that the latter is a bad person - but it may mean that the person doesn't know how to be in a healthy respectful relationship. The same goes for cheaters. <BR/><BR/>And for the record: there are plenty of gamers who will find a way to cheat on their spouses, online and in some occasions offline (as a result of an online affair). Just because they are sitting at home does not mean that they will be faithful. The whole "it's better that they are at home instead of outside drinking and cheating" is fallacious thinking, and I've experienced myself how easy it is to get caught up by an online emotional affair even if you don't think it is possible.Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07924922999762832408noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1124756154165858622005-08-22T17:15:00.000-07:002005-08-22T17:15:00.000-07:00I am a psychologist. Mother passed on, and dad ne...I am a psychologist. Mother passed on, and dad needed 24/7 care. I sold my farm and moved home to suburban life and met EQ. I have played for 6mo, 12-15 hours per day. I do it because I love the game and basically until my father passes must stay here to care for him. The question is for those that are frustrated with mates playing the game is..what would they be doing if they were not playing? Napping on the couch? Watching tv from 7-11? My father has commented several times that I am in my room playing on the computer. Oh, it would be okay though, if I sat in the same room with him and watched tv for 5 hours? Everyone wants to be happy and have a good time. If the hubby or wife is playing the game more than you prefer, look at the other side of things. He's not gone with his buddies out on the town, he/she isn't having an affair. Is it fair that thing's in the marriage aren't what they used to be? No, of course not. But you have a situation where some sort of compromise is needed or the relationship will eventually become non existent. I hear more complaints from wives than from husbands. Why not get involved in the game with him in exchange for some personal time for the two of you. Why not say "let's go out and catch dinner, and then come back and play the game a couple hours." Or I have one gentelman in my guild that will say "I'll be back in bit, helping the wife with the laundry". Continued negativity toward something someone clearly likes doing, is not going to make your situation better. You have a choice to make and every right to make it, as you too have a right to want your life to be as you see that should be. It's up to you..get involved, or get divorced. I personally would be grateful that the person is at least at home and being the faithful partner..too many are not, using the fishing, hunting, and golf courses as their perfect cover. Try the game with your partner..get another puter and be in another room..role play in the game..you may find he logs the game a whole lot sooner more often!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1124746757673300812005-08-22T14:39:00.000-07:002005-08-22T14:39:00.000-07:00I think when you have a happy self-respect and sel...I think when you have a happy self-respect and self-love, you'll end up making the best decisions for your own well-being. I hope your friend will make the decision that's best for him. All the best :)Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07924922999762832408noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1124444932997287042005-08-19T02:48:00.000-07:002005-08-19T02:48:00.000-07:00I wrote the second post, regarding quitting 4 mont...I wrote the second post, regarding quitting 4 months ago. In answer to your question: nope, not married to each other. I don't have kids. <BR/><BR/>Day 5 -- still off Warcraft. Got an email from a Warcraft friend. He may leave too.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1124395556778454902005-08-18T13:05:00.000-07:002005-08-18T13:05:00.000-07:00Are the last two commenters married to each other,...Are the last two commenters married to each other, by any chance? The 4 month period seems more than just a coincidence.<BR/><BR/>Either way, I hope your decisions to address the issue helped resolve your concerns and frustrations. Anything in excess is bad for anyone, and sometimes it is deceptively easy to get sucked into playing an online computer game for hours, days, months, years. It's just not worth it - life's too precious for that. <BR/><BR/>You can only speak up and hope that s/he has enough wisdom and intelligence to smarten up. If you are especially lucky, s/he will have trust in you and your concerns. Other than that, your responsibilities lie with your own happiness and that of your child.<BR/><BR/>All the best.Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07924922999762832408noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1124315630587906202005-08-17T14:53:00.000-07:002005-08-17T14:53:00.000-07:00Four months ago, I joined World of Warcraft. One m...Four months ago, I joined World of Warcraft. <BR/><BR/>One month ago, I admitted that I was addicted. <BR/><BR/>Three days ago, I quit cold-turkey. <BR/><BR/>Today, I am still clean. <BR/><BR/>I learned that quitting addictions are a series of small steps, each leading away from the addiction. And, I have learned to appreciate each step.<BR/><BR/>This site and similar sites have been comforting to me, in my process to quit. <BR/><BR/>I keep reminding myself as to why I am quitting -- My husband wants to spend time with me; I want to pick up a new hobby; there are 2 books I want to read; and I want to do a better job at work. <BR/><BR/>All of these things are meaningful to me, and takes time and energy. <BR/><BR/>I remind myself of specific things I can do while not gaming online. And, I read about others who have quit gaming and am inspired, motivated, and reminded of my own reasons.<BR/><BR/>This might just be a long post to say thank-you for collecting these stories.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1124309038537101552005-08-17T13:03:00.000-07:002005-08-17T13:03:00.000-07:00I have read all the posts here and would like to s...I have read all the posts here and would like to say that I have been in this situation for about 4 months now with my wife. She watched my son play and I made the mistake of buying her a laptop for her b-day. She has not stopped for 4 months on WOW. I hate everything about Blizzard Entertainment and WOW. I hate the sounds, scenes, people, etc. I find myself even hating to be around her while she plays. When she started calling one of the male players and talked for 14 hours in one weekend about the "game", yea right, I hit the ceiling. We argued for days. The calling I think has stopped, but what is the difference when you can "chat" in the game until 4 or 5 AM every weekend or day? I feel that I will make a decision on our so-called marriage myself. I can't see giving her a choice like "me or the game” Is there anyone out there that has made this decision?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1123462059109627102005-08-07T17:47:00.000-07:002005-08-07T17:47:00.000-07:00Thank you very much for all your responses and a b...Thank you very much for all your responses and a big thank you especially to the last respondent! One of my main reason for creating this site was to collect real stories that gamers could read and reflect on without feeling nagged on / criticized. I know that when I was playing obsessively, reading stories like this would have helped me much more than someone telling me that I was playing it to much. Even now, reading this reminds me to stay balanced in life and to seek out greater meaning in the things I do everyday. I'm happy to hear that someone else was able to get something out of this site, too.Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07924922999762832408noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1123309869182281042005-08-05T23:31:00.000-07:002005-08-05T23:31:00.000-07:00Neither of you are alone. There are hundreds of t...Neither of you are alone. There are hundreds of thousands (maybe millions) of people addicted to these games. I was addicted to EQ and then EQ2; when I finally realized what it was doing to my relationship with my wife I forced myself to quit. I'm not kidding when I say that it was probably the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life. I ultimately had to get rid of my computer so that I would not even have the possibility of playing. I'm writing this on my wife's laptop now. :-)<BR/><BR/>For those truly addicted, quitting is a monstrous task that feels impossible. I quit and restarted countless times before I finally ditched my gaming machine and left myself with no way to start up again. I think it's important to be supportive to those trying to quit, and to help show them how much better their lives can be without these massive timesinks. Ultimately, though, I don't think you can ever force someone to quit--they have to be able to observe and understand the effects of their addiction and decide to stop on their own.<BR/><BR/>At the end of the day, don't be afraid to seek professional help. Sometimes I think that I might have been better off if I had access to professional help myself while I was trying to quit. I think that it might have made my transition from "game addict" to "normal person" a little less stressful, and maybe today I wouldn't still suffer from pangs of emotion over quitting and sometimes wishing that I hadn't...<BR/><BR/>One thing that really helped me to want to quit was when I found this site and read all of the stories on it. I first saw them as foreign and unrelated to me; later, though, I realized just how much of my own life was reflected in these postings. It was then that I finally realized just how much I had to stop.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1123301843786796712005-08-05T21:17:00.000-07:002005-08-05T21:17:00.000-07:00Wow. This is exactly my life. My husband is a te...Wow. This is exactly my life. My husband is a teacher and he is off for the summer which means non-stop gaming in addition to watching our 2 children. He claims he has no good friends in real life (true) and that his online friends are his real friends. So - pulling him from the game is taking him from his friends. He has no need for or interest in me - other than to take care of the kids at night and pay the bills. We keep tryin gto make these agreements about limiting play, but it seems they don't work becuase if we are doing "nothing " for more than a few minutes, he either mopes around or falls asleep or just ends up playing. I am at a loss but comforted to know that I am not alone.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6241291.post-1123274219788115252005-08-05T13:36:00.000-07:002005-08-05T13:36:00.000-07:00He seems stuck. At this point depending on how far...He seems stuck. At this point depending on how far he gets he may never return possibly. It only gets worse. It is like a drug. He starts up, and never wants to stop. You've gained a lot with him overtime and now he's gaining a lot in this game and he'll never want to give it up either. Depending on how long this has gone on may depend if you wish to give him the choice of you or the game.<BR/><BR/>Look at your life now and see if it was what it was when you first married. I've read a lot of stories on the limiting of it and they usually fail. They do the same where they work out for a little bit and then it goes back to square 1.<BR/><BR/>I remember being sucked into Final Fantasy's MMORPG but barely having a social life. Even though I still got good grades in my 1st college semester I still wasn't happy. I had friends and barely went out to the mall or anything socialable. I couldn't go outside, I rejected a night at the movies to get some item thing. <BR/><BR/>I chose to quit so I could feel free and it felt great. Other people get these attachments to their characters and items that they never want to let go of these imaginary things. It's as if they really feel like they have that sword or that armor or whatever the item is because they spent hours and hours getting it. This is partly why it's so hard to get them off of games like this.<BR/><BR/>If you decided to read through this I can give you my advice. If you get fed up with him being like this you may possibly want to consider taking charge of the situation for yourself. Let him know you've had enough and that you want this whole thing to stop. It seems you've already started on this and that you need more enforcement. You don't want to be married to someone who sits at a computer all day doing nothing with himself. Married couples are couples, not just roomies. You want a husband, not a roomie that sits at the computer. You want to go places and do things with your husband that you married years ago.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com